peace {advent}

It's our first Christmas in our new home and my husband's outdoor project of late has been cutting back some of the brush on a downward sloping part our property. When the kids and I started campaigning one morning to go pick out our Christmas tree, he told us simply to come outside with him. We threw coats on top of our pjs and marched out into the yard, somewhat unceremoniously. He'd been saving one of the little pine trees just for Christmas.

In the yard it looked cute, maybe a bit lanky but otherwise healthy and the right size. The kids were so excited about cutting down a tree in our very own yard and then dragging it into the house. Except for Sommer who was having a grumpy moment.  Fortunately, we were at home and she had the luxury of staying inside (or rather, we had the luxury of leaving her inside.)

How is it that these trees always look so different outside? I believe it grew 4 more feet once we set it up in our open stairwell. We then proceeded to decorate the tallest, saddest little Christmas tree we have ever had. I am calling it the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree on steroids. How can a tree this size only have three branches for hanging lights and ornaments? It took me nearly an hour to get lights hung convincingly, and I don't even want to mention the bald spot. Then the tree was misbehaving, leaning in an awkward direction, until it finally fell over 2 days later. It is now tied to the banister.

The tree keeps whacking me in the face, as it has gradually encroached on my regularly used path through the entryway. It is not my favorite tree ever, but it seems to represent something true about Christmas. There is a lot of childlike joy inspiring this tree, and a fun memory, and the onset of tradition. Christmas has never been about perfection.

I was prone to some unsettled feelings this week. There weren't any big reasons, just some strained conversations, unpredictable futures, uncertain outcomes, inability to please certain people in my life. All of these niggling in the back of my mind even when I wasn't consciously in thought over them. All of them making me aware of how much my little world lacks perfection. All of those little imperfections creating a lack of peace in my spirit.

Peace was this week's advent theme. In my reading, the peace of Christ took on a new meaning for me as the kind of peace that is independent of our circumstances. It is the kind of peace that bleeds into the unsettled corners of our lives even when the world around us seems to be falling apart and there is nothing we can do to control it. The kind of peace that surpasses all understanding.

We hear a lot about Peace on Earth at Christmas, and I want that for our world so badly. This is a place with some big problems, like genocide and child trafficking and terrorism just to name a few. Because of it, real Peace on Earth can seem pretty far away. We have been promised that one day that kind of peace is coming. There will be a future world without so many external struggles.

In the meantime, today, we can experience a different kind of internal peace. God offers us the kind of peace that comes from wholeness and harmony and completeness in Him. The kind that allows us to make tough decisions that others don't necessarily agree with, and still have peace knowing that we have followed after Him to the best of our ability. Seeking peace through the perfection of our circumstances will never be long-lasting. Peace comes through righteousness, and righteousness can only come through Christ.

In preparing for the birth of baby Jesus, I am thanking God for the kind of peace we get to experience today, even as we wait for a better kind of Peace in our future.

"And he will be called
    Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
    Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
Of the increase of his government and peace
    there will be no end.
He will reign on David’s throne
    and over his kingdom,
establishing and upholding it
    with justice and righteousness

from that time on and forever."

Isaiah 9:6-7